Therapist reveals the 7 things that are MORE important in a relationship than being in love – and the questions to ask if you want to test how you feel about your partner
- Therapist has shared the seven things more important than love in a relationship
- Jeff Guenther said the focus should be on support, respect and understanding
- Shared the seven questions people should ask themselves about their partner
- Bitesize advice proved a hit with viewers who said they wish they knew it sooner
Feeling a deep sense of love and affection is a key part of any healthy long-term relationship.
But one expert insists that, contrary to popular opinion, it is not the most important thing.
Speaking in a new TikTok video, Jeff Guenther, a therapist from Portland, Oregon, explains there are seven other key factors that are more essential to the fabric of a healthy relationship, including feeling like your dreams are supported and being able to set healthy boundaries.
Feeling a deep sense of love and affection is a key part of any healthy long-term relationship. But a therapists insists it is not the most important thing (stock image)
‘I love that you like your babe and I bet they like you to but mutual like, or love, will only get you so far,’ he said.
The expert, who has built up a 2million-strong following with his bitesize relationship and mental health tips, shared four questions everyone should ask themselves:
Speaking in a new TikTok video, Jeff Guenther, pictured, explains there are seven other key factors that are more essential to the fabric of a healthy relationship, including feeling like your dreams are supported and being able to set healthy boundaries
The tips proved a hit with viewers, many of whom said they wish they had known about these deeper questions before they wed.
One posted: ‘Fights with my ex made me feel hopeless, drained, and like I had to drop my needs to comfort someone else.’
Another commented: ‘This is the first relationship where I’ve been able to say “yes” to these questions…’
A third added: ‘I am horrified by the way this made me feel about my relationship.’
Jeff regularly shares checklists for viewers to test the health of their relationships.
The tips proved a hit with viewers, many of whom said they could be applied to friendships as well as romantic relationships
Posting last year, he shared the 12 questions all couples should be able to answer about each other six months into a relationship.
He said knowing about how your partner defines success and how their family have affected their growth are ‘important basics to build on’.
Other questions relate to what comforts your partner when they are sad and stressed and what ‘lights them up inside.’
The video was liked more than 1.3 million times on the social media platform.
Revealed: The 12 questions you should be able to answer about your partner
Therapist Jeff Guenther LPC, from Portland, Oregon, shared these 12 questions everyone should ask and answer after six months together. He said you’re doing ‘great’ if you can answer nine out of 12.
1. What makes them laugh or cry?
2. What are they passionate about?
3. How did their family affect their growth?
4. What makes them mad?
5. Do they have spiritual beliefs and how to they effect their life choices?
6. What are their defining moments?
7. What is the most important to them?
8. How would they define success?
9. What kind of support do they need when they’re stressed or sad?
10. What are they the most proud of about themselves?
11. What can instantly light them up inside?
12. How do they recharge their emotional batteries?
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