‘My son’s getting married but none of my family have any role at the wedding’

Our son is getting married and doesn’t want our money or our input.

Ten of us from our family have been invited, but none of us has a role.

He doesn’t want his sisters as bridesmaids or his brother as best man.

My husband and I are not going to be seated at the top table and our son has requested that we don’t “show him up”.

Also, my husband is a great singer and usually gives a song, but my son said this must NOT happen.

Basically, the whole day is to be about the bride. Her parents are paying for everything and we’re to sup up and shut up.

How dare he?

JANE SAYS: Traditionally, a bride’s parents paid for the whole wedding.

Clearly your son’s new wife wants things her way.

But maybe you need to remind your son that by getting married, she is joining your family.

You may not be perfect, but you are entitled to respect.

I suspect not having to contribute financially is something of a relief, but why isn’t your son sticking up for you? If he’s ashamed, he needs to get over himself.


My ex won’t leave me alone, even though I’ve explained that I don’t love her any more. I’m dating someone new.

But my ex keeps messaging me and asking my friends about my plans and movements. This is so annoying.

My new girlfriend is losing patience and thinks I should do something, but what can I do when I’ve known my ex for years and we live in a close-knit community?

JANE SAYS: Your ex may feel you have unfinished business, but this must stop. She misses you, but there can be no reconciliation because you’ve moved on – and she Make it clear you’ll block her and cut her out completely if she doesn’t walk away with dignity.

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