My wife is uninterested and talks about doing the shopping while we're having sex

DEAR DEIDRE: MY wife talks about doing the shopping while we are having sex – which doesn’t even happen very often these days.

When we first got together she was as keen on sex as I was but her interest seemed to fade when we had the children.

We’re in our late forties now and the kids are grown up.

I have always had a high sex drive and you would think we would now have the freedom to enjoy ourselves together again but it has not turned out that way.

If we do have sex it’s like she is not interested.

We have had to come to live with my father-in-law as he is divorced from my wife’s mum, lives alone and has a brain tumour so my wife is caring for him.

I understand that’s a worry but we have been here for two months and not had sex once.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Maybe your wife would feel like sex more often if you did your fair share of the shopping and helping with your father-in-law.

And how much of a hands-on dad were you?

Do you take care to ensure sex is really satisfying for your wife so she longs for more?

Put in some extra effort outside the bedroom as well as in it, and ask your wife what else would help to put a smile on her face – and then she is more likely to put a smile on yours.

My e-leaflet Thrilling A Woman In Bed could help you both.

NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE I haven't had sex with my partner for four years as he can't get an erection

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