DEAR DEIDRE: I\u2019M furious after my brother asked my ex-husband to be a godfather to his new baby.<\/p>\n
My brother is, and has always been, good friends with my now ex.<\/p>\n
We\u2019re all in our mid-thirties and met in high school.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve never made a fuss about their friendship, as I didn\u2019t feel there would be anything to gain from doing so. <\/p>\n
But I\u2019ve secretly always hoped that it would tail off with time.<\/p>\n
Instead, they now seem to be closer than ever.<\/p>\n
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My brother is over the moon with his new baby and planning a christening. <\/p>\n
Instead of making it a quiet family occasion, he\u2019s decided to have a big party and invite all his friends.<\/p>\n
But I was dismayed when he mentioned my ex-husband would be godfather. <\/p>\n
I\u2019ve told my brother that if this is the case then I won\u2019t attend the christening. <\/p>\n
But he is confused and has said I\u2019m causing a rift in the family, as my ex and I got divorced over a decade ago.<\/p>\n
My brother has always been a serial cheat so I think he sympathises with my ex, and his current partner is really friendly with my ex\u2019s girlfriend.<\/p>\n
They all go on holiday together with our ten-year-old daughter, and my brother\u2019s children.<\/p>\n
Usually, I ignore all of this, as I realise my daughter benefits from holidays with her dad \u2013 even though I had a newborn when my husband was cheating on me. <\/p>\n
But if my ex is my nephew\u2019s godfather this would mean that both he and his woman would be even more involved in my family\u2019s life.<\/p>\n
I really can\u2019t face spending more time with them. What should I do?<\/p>\n
DEIDRE SAYS:\u00a0<\/strong><\/span>It is totally understandable that you don\u2019t want to socialise with your ex and the woman he cheated on you with.<\/p>\n
Does your brother not realise the history?<\/p>\n
If you don\u2019t want to go, don\u2019t put yourself through it. <\/p>\n
But you could ask your brother if it\u2019s possible to celebrate the christening another way, such as with a celebratory meal.<\/p>\n
Surely he would understand your reluctance to spend the day with your ex-husband and his partner.<\/p>\n
It would help you to talk this through with familylives.org.uk, who can help with any family issue.<\/p>\n
And read my support pack How Counselling Can Help?<\/p>\n
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Source: Read Full Article<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"